I deleted this entry on 7-29-07. I have thought long and hard about this. I have always kept this blog as an online journal. It was never meant to anger, insight, or even cause conflict. It was a place where any emotion at any given time would be able to find it’s place in cyberspace. I have written to the stars for quite some time now, and my words have traversed the convoluted silicon and copper wire turnpike of the worlds vast internet. I have always tried to live an honorable life. Hoping, and trying to make decisions and lead by an example based on love and fairness. I have lived the life of an idealist, hoping that by doing this the same would be returned. I have learned that human nature does not offer such a response. We should not “expect” anything, we should not be “mindful” but, as one man put it…. shut up and dance. I guess this is what the world needs, more mindless drones of society riding the capitalist roller coaster of life, finding our way down the tracks around the bend and back again to be dropped down the descent, never to create new rides with new turns. What are we all afraid of?
I have been disappointed in this, but have also realized that it is sometimes a journey we must take ourselves. Being careful as to those we bring along.
But also I am conflicted, because how then do we strive for that place, make that world where fairness and equality are not blunted by one mans view of world order?
I have not yet figured this out.
I am happy to have the life I have. to work at the place I work, to serve the people I serve. I Do owe this to those who write my paycheck, and have realized that it is not in ones best interest to bite the hand that feeds them.
I also feel that we should be encouraged to express our feelings, and I hope that sometimes these feelings will be taken for what they are, expressions, not condemnations, but possibly one mans thoughts on any given day.
As for the words that once filled this empty place in cyberspace, I feel that the edited version makes more sense. As for the point of the whole thing in the first place….. We all work very hard, we are grateful for the jobs we have been given, we hope that those who employ us will be grateful for our hard work, we seek approval, are grateful for praise, and as all humans seek value in our lives.
The life of the working man, especially that man who paves the way for all of us so fortunate, is often lost under the ruffle of the fallen leaves. I hope that he, who walks tall in the forest, will take time to realize that the rich land on which he treads is often paved with the lives of those less fortunate. I would hope that when the time comes we all take a moment to wipe the dirt off our feet, pay homage to the land, give back to the earth, and thank it for the wonderful life it brings!!